Developing Gratitude

As we look forward to celebrating Thanksgiving this month, it seems fitting to spend some time reflecting on gratitude. 

By definition, gratitude is the quality of being thankful and showing appreciation for something we have received or something done for us. It reflects a positive feeling or attitude and often requires an acknowledgement on our part: “Thank you so much! This was very thoughtful of you. I appreciate it.” 

Although it’s considered a noun, for me, gratitude is a verb. It’s an action. When we work to develop gratitude and share it out loud with those around us, it’s disarming. It connects us with others. It draws us into relationship. 

I didn’t always understand this and had to work on developing gratitude. Here are a few of my favorite things I learned about gratitude.

Gratitude is good for our physical, mental, and emotional health.

Practicing gratitude can have a positive impact on our overall health. Researchers have uncovered several benefits to developing an attitude of gratitude. 

It can:

• Lower blood pressure
• Improve immune function
• Facilitate more efficient sleep
• Reduce risks of depression and anxiety
• Decrease substance abuse
• Increase exercise and healthy eating habits
• Facilitate higher levels of self-esteem
• Lower overall stress
• Strengthen relationships

Psychologist Robert Emmons suggests that gratitude can have a positive effect on our lives. On so many levels, it can transform the way we think, feel, and behave.

Gratitude blocks toxic emotions, such as envy, resentment, regret and depression, which can destroy our happiness…It’s impossible to feel envious and grateful at the same time.

Robert Emmons

Not only is practicing gratitude good for our physical, mental, and emotional health, it’s good for our relational health, too. The significant people in our lives need to know we appreciate and feel grateful for them. 

Also, when we regularly thank God for the significant people in our lives, it helps us develop a mindset of gratitude, which is reflected in our relationships.

Gratitude contributes to contentment.

One of the best things about practicing gratitude is that it requires us to be present in the moment. We can’t be living in the past or fantasizing about the future, while attempting to practice gratitude. 

Expressing gratitude often requires us to observe and acknowledge the people and things in our lives that we’re thankful for—right now, today. 

Many people associate gratitude with happiness, and there might be a connection here. But it seems like gratitude takes us to a deeper place: a place that is peaceful and satisfying, where we don’t want or need anything more. 

One of my favorite scriptures speaks of this:

I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength.

Philippians 4:11-13 (NIV)

When we practice gratitude, it not only helps us focus on God’s goodness in our lives, but it also contributes to feeling content with life, exactly where we are today.

Gratitude is a learned behavior.

While it’s true that some people are more naturally grateful than others, for many of us, we’ve had to work at developing an attitude of gratitude.

At 20 years old, when I was diagnosed with a chronic disease, it would have been easy to feel sorry for myself and completely focus on the negative aspects and outcomes of my disease. Early on, I remember praying, 

“Heavenly Father, I know You have plans for my life, far beyond what I can see today. And while I know I will have difficult days, please help me to maintain perspective and put someone in front of me whose suffering is worse than mine.” 

This might sound like a bizarre approach, but I had witnessed strong Christians who deeply loved the Lord, who experienced something challenging and it changed their lives. It hardened their heart and pulled them away from relationship with God. I didn’t want this to happen to me. 

This was one of the most impactful ways I developed gratitude. Especially on difficult days, God was so faithful to show me someone who was far worse off than me. And in that moment, I would thank the Lord for His goodness and grace in my life, and also pray for the person who God used to help me maintain perspective about my disease. 

I learned how to be grateful through this very tangible, real life experience that created in me a heart attitude of gratitude. I’m so thankful for this life lesson and how it continues to strengthen my relationship with God and others.

If you’re looking for ways to develop gratitude, you might start with a gratitude journal: writing down things you’re thankful for on a daily basis. Or start telling the people around you how grateful you are for them and what you specifically appreciate about them. Try it! It’s not rocket science, but it does take practice.

Developing gratitude benefits us in so many ways and is definitely worth the work!

 Kendra Cherry, What is Gratitude? Verywell Mind, October 29, 2021.

 UC Davis Health Center, Gratitude is good medicine. November 25, 2015.

The views, opinions, and ideas expressed in this blog are those of the author alone and do not reflect an official position of Pure Desire Ministries, except where expressly stated.